Why? The question that never ends. For some the why comes from a curiosity, for others, a place of despair. For a long time, finding answers to the world's biggest why's had my stomach in knots. Unsatisfied until I found something I could hang my hat on. Especially when it comes to people being harmed.
Why do bad things happen to good people who are innocently going about their business? What possesses someone to be so filled with selfishness that they have to take advantage or destroy another person? Those are the questions I wrestle with time to time, especially as a Christian who believes in an all-powerful God. A God who brings the dead back to life and has historically shifted scenarios to save people. I found myself wrestling these questions again with hot tears of anger and pain streaming down my face upon finding out a friend of mine had been assaulted. I could hear the shame in their voice, and it is a devastating thing for anyone to feel, but especially someone you love dearly when that has been a struggle of yours. There I was again, asking why?
I have heard people say things like, "Nothing happens that passes through God's hand's first, just look at Job." Sorry, not sorry, but that is a load of garbage. That would mean that He's ok with us being hurt, and there are too many scriptures that contradict the idea of Him being cool with suffering. It would be like you handing your child or best friend to a rapist or murderer knowing that in a few years they would be ok or going to a better place through their death. Of course, no one would do that, so why on earth would we think that God would treat those He calls His children that way?!
At the same time, He's not a puppeteer. From the beginning of time we were granted free will. It's free will that's wreaking havoc. Whether those are our choices or the choices of others, it is never something that comes from heaven.
"Whatever is good and perfect comes down to us from God our Father, who created all the lights in the heavens. He never changes or casts a shifting shadow." James 1:17
The difference between faith and belief is that one can shift and the other stands. Although our belief's shape our faith, it is our faith that causes us to rise up. To believe in good and trust that we will heal when we are broken. It's a comfort in knowing that hard times don't last forever and will be used for good. That doesn't mean we are never sad, depressed, hurt, broken, or angry over the things that occur, but we don't stay there. We don't set up camp in doubt, disappointment, pain, rejection, or our suffering. We trudge through, and through those processes are made more whole. Not whole in a sense that parts of us aren't dinged, damaged, or stolen, but that we become more...us. I can't think of any other way to put it. Every time I am at a crossroads of trying to figure out what to make of something and I choose the high road, to have faith, to trust, I become better.
We will never have all the answers. That's hard to accept as a why person, but I am happier having accepted that no matter what happens to me, the people I love, or others in the world, we are promised that darkness isn't the end.